The Science of Success
Matt Bodnar presents the The #1 Evidence Based Gro
The #1 Evidence Based Growth Podcast on the Internet. The Science of Success is about the search for evidence based personal growth. It's about exploring ways to improve your decision-making, understand your mind and how psychology rules the world around you, and learn from experts and thought leaders about ways we can become better versions of ourselves.
Command Your Focus and Attention on What Really Matters with Chris Bailey
In this episode we show you how to command your focus and attention. We discuss why many people have the wrong idea of what it means to be productive - and how thinking that you need to boil your life down to spreadsheets and checklists is the wrong way to approach productivity . We share the secret ingredient for true productivity - and look at exactly how you can implement it, practically and realistically, in your own life with our guest Chris Bailey. Chris is a productivity expert, speaker, and best-selling author. His career began by conducting a year-long experiment examining best practices for productivity which is documented in his book, The Productivity Project. His latest book Hyperfocus aims to help readers stay focused and avoid distractions. His work has been featured in The Harvard Business Review, The New York Times, TED, Fast Company, and more!Many people have the wrong idea of what productivity is - and it often leads to implementing the wrong solutionsIt's not about efficiency and boiling your life down to checklists and spreadsheetsIf there's one thing that underlies real productivity is INTENTIONWe are perfectly productive when we accomplish the things we set out to doIntention is like the "wood behind the arrow"The percentage of the day with which you act with intention is directly proportional to your results and to the quality of your lifeHow much control of attention you have is correlated with happiness, satisfaction, and productivityWhat is intentionality and why is it so important?Most people manage their time relatively well, but where they massively fall short is managing their ATTENTIONThe novelty bias in our brains causes us to constantly jump into new phenomenon to get our next dopamine hitDeliberate mind wandering is as important as the time we focus on being productive"Not all those who wander are lost" - J. R. R. TolkeinCultivating "unfocus", mind wandering, and contemplative routines open up space to focus on and determine what's most important - to unearth the beautiful, brilliant ideas we wouldn't arrive at otherwiseResearchers found that people who watched 6 or more hours of news coverage about a bombing were more likely to develop PTSD than someone who was actually at the bombing event (Boston Marathon)How do you go about taming your distractions?Does meditation waste time or does it make you more productive?Meditation is one of the few things that gives you more attention and focus for other thingsWhen you have an active meditation practice your working memory increases by up to 30%If you don't execute on productivity ideas and strategies - what's the point?Meditation has the best time-adjusted return of any productivity strategyWe look at busyness as a proxy for how productive we are when that's completely wrong.Working on a sleep deficit shrinks your ability to focus by up to 60%There's a huge amount of guilt, especially in western society, around taking breaks, resting, and downtime - even though these are HUGE components of being highly effective and productiveHow do you deal with the GUILT of not feeling productive?Set 3 intentions every day, set 3 intentions every week, and set 3 intentions every yearPre-Decisions create intention throughout your dayHow do you Re-Charge your attention?Habitual tasks create the structure that frees our mind to think freely and wanderHomework: What resonated the most for YOU - take action on that?
Are You Ready To Spend More Time On What You LOVE? A Conversation with Gay Hendricks
In this episode we explore how to unleash and live in your genius. How do you discover what your genius is? How can you spend more and more of your time doing what you love? We discuss how you can unlock the incredible potential within yourself and avoid the traps that may stop you from getting there. We share the lessons learned from working with more than 20,000 people to help them on their own journeys to genius - and give you the exact strategies and tactics to create a positive upward spiral of genius for yourself with our guest Dr. Gay Hendricks. Dr. Gay Hendricks is the president of the Hendricks Institute and has been a thought leader in the fields of relationship transformation and body-mind therapies for over 45 years. Gay earned his Ph.D in counseling psychology from Stanford and taught at the University of Colorado for 21 years and has conducted seminars across the globe. He is also a multi-bestselling author, having written more than 40 books most recently The Joy of Genius which was released earlier this year!The 2 big issues that human beings faceUpper limit problemsLiving in your geniusPeople get used to operating at a certain level of success, happiness, etc - we often trip these fears that cause us to sabotage back to the levels we feel we deserveLessons from working with over 20,000 people and 5000 couplesAlmost everyone, no matter how successful you are, has a lot of potential left to be developedYou need to make a commitment to bringing forth your genius. You have absolutely no idea how much potential you have left inside of yourself.It doesn't matter how bright you are - it's about making an inner commitment to bringing your genius out. That inner commitment is the first starting place.How Gay went from spending 10% of his life doing what he loves - it took him years to get to 30%, years more to get to 50% - until 20 years later he spends 90% of his time doing what he lovesThe first thing you need to do is find out if you're courageous enough to make a heart felt commitment to living in your zone of geniusSimple Mantra - "I Commit To Bringing Forth My Genius No Matter What It Takes"You must find 10 minutes per day committed to finding your geniusGenius is addictive and its contagious - the more you do it, the more you want to do it , the more you inspire people with your genius, the more people who get inspiredWhat is the genius Move? How can you do it everyday?What's a Genius Moment? We are confronted with them every day.A genius moment may look like a problem at the surface, but it's often actually an invitation to spot your geniusThere are some things you can control, and some things you cannot controlWhat often makes miserable is focusing on things that we don't have control over whatsoeverNone of us have any control whatsoever over the past - the only reason to think about the past is to identify something in this moment that you can do differentlyTrue creativity is when you're expressing your own genius - and when you're doing it in a way that is inspiring others around you"All of humanities problems stem from not being able to sit quietly in a room" - Blaise PascalHomework: Sit for 10 minutes quietly living with the question of "What is my genius?"If you already know what your genius is - ask yourself " How can I bring forth my genius in a way that inspires me and other people I interact with?"How and why you can use "Wonder questions" to discover your life's purpose
Stop Being Afraid To Be YOU - The Power of Bold Authenticity with Dr. Aziz Gazipura
In this episode, we explore how you can confidently be yourself - even if you're afraid of what other people may do or think. We discuss how our obsession with niceness and people pleasing is often a problem and share specific tools you can use to overcome it. We also talk about the power and importance of saying no - and the right way to do it so that you can move away from approval seeking and step into bold authenticity with our guest Dr. Aziz Gazipura.Dr. Aziz Gazipura is a clinical psychologist and founder of The Center for Social Confidence, which is dedicated to helping others break through their shyness and social anxiety. He is the author of the #1 Amazon best-seller Not Nice: Stop People-Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty... And Start Speaking Up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, And Unapologetically Being Yourself. Aziz's work has helped thousands of people through workshops, coaching, media appearances, and more.Do you struggle with people pleasing and being afraid to say no to people?What's the difference between being nice and behind kind?A lot of the behaviors that we think are nice often come from fear, obligation, or guiltThe opposite of niceness is BOLD AUTHENTICITYNiceness is a way of being that is focused on "damage control"- being in a place of "safety mode"When we are focused on being nice our #1 priority is to focus on avoiding possible danger - making sure everyone is pleasedIf you didn't care at all what people thought of you - would couldn't have any relationships - you would be a sociopath"Nice conditioning" - is a pattern that is conditioned into us from an early age. We're systemically told not to trust our own desires and to instead "do the right thing" and "be nice"Why we've lost the ability to ask "what do I want" and how that is dangerousWhy you should be more selfishExcessive niceness is not benign - it's coming from a place of fear, insecurity, and feeling threatened - and when you're constantly in that space you are much more likely to experience symptoms of stress, anxiety, sickness, pain and more - TMS - Tension Mytosis Syndrome - from living in place of chronic stressFirst become AWARE that it's OK to say no and that we need to say noTo retrain from niceness to authenticity - it's about being uncomfortable and discomfort trainingYou live in a cloud of stories and dramatic fantasies about what will happen when you say no - TEST THE ASSUMPTION and see what happens.Why you should do a "social fitness" "warm up" to get out of your comfort zone. Friendly greetings to strangers is a great strategy for this.It's like launching into orbit - after a few tries, you reach a breaking point where you "pop" into zero gravity and you're no longer being held back.Niceness is not serving you, it's not who you are, it's a safety pattern.This is how you STOP BEING AFRAID TO BE YOUFind 2 opportunities per week to specifically ask for what you want. Then build that muscle, start asking for things that are edgier and edgier and edgier for you.Homework: Make a fundamental decision that you don't want to be as nice anymore. Write out a short paragraph about why it's no longer serving you to be the nice and that you are going to do something different.Homework: Pick one thing - what's the one thing that will be the easiest for you to do that would benefit you and change your life the most?
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